Instead of setting ambitious, outcome-based goals for the year that are often doomed to fail (more on this here), I’ve been asking myself different questions over the last few months. Given my overall objective of living a life of calm ambition, I’ve been reflecting on:
- Where do I want more calm in my life?
- What’s causing stress and anxiety in my life? How can I remove it?
It was eye-opening to see the difference in the quality of my answers compared to the standard question: “What do I want to achieve this year?”
Let me give you an example to illustrate the difference.
Outcome-based financial goals
The typical approach to financial goal-setting includes statements like:
- Make $100,000 this year.
- Get out of debt.
- Negotiate a $10,000 salary increase.
- Save $20,000 for a house down payment.
Can you already feel the tension?
This is a rigid, black-and-white way of thinking. You either succeed or fail. And the worst part? You won’t know the outcome until the very last day of the year. To me, that’s a stressful way to live.
Cultivating financial calm
This year, I decided to bring more calm in the area of personal finances. Having started two businesses in the last 5 years brought complexity that needs decluttering and simplifying. Turns out, the approach to cultivating calm is very different from setting a rigid numerical target.
For me, financial calm comes from clarity, simplicity, and having a plan for the future—not from hitting an arbitrary milestone. I don’t need to reach my final destination to feel at ease. Instead, I need to:
- Know exactly where I stand with my finances.
- Have a simple system for managing money.
- Follow a plan for the future that makes sense for me.
All of this can be achieved in a sprint or two. No need to wait until December 31st to feel a sense of accomplishment. It doesn’t mean you’ll hit your financial goals in such a short time. But you will get the desired level of calm knowing that you have a plan and you are on the right path.
Journey vs. Destination
It’s the classic journey vs. destination debate. When you focus on financial outcomes, you’re fixated on the destination. When you focus on financial calm, you’re prioritizing the journey.
In my experience, if you enjoy the journey, you’ll naturally reach your destination. But if you hate the process, no matter how great the goal, your chances of success shrink dramatically.
Other areas
What if we focused on cultivating calm in our relationship with food and excercise vs. losing 30lbs?
What if we focused on cultivating calm in our work vs. trying to hit some arbitrary metrics?
What if we focused on cultivating calm in our daily life vs. trying to optimize the heck out of it with time-consuming rituals and habit stacking?
How would our approach be different?
What if calm was THE goal?
That’s the real question.
Calm is the opposite of anxiety. Calm comes from addressing uncertainty, making sometimes difficult decisions about your future, and gaining clarity on how to get there. It’s about building simple systems and following them consistently. I don’t think you can go wrong here.
And the magic? You don’t have to wait for the final day of your journey to feel successful—you can experience the sense of calm (which is the goal) right away the moment you start walking on your chosen path.
How to Work with Me:
- Go all in. One-on-one coaching for a full sprint. I’ll teach you how to apply the Agile framework to your goals and life conditions. Instead of using generic examples, we’ll work directly with what’s happening in your life right now, so you can start making progress right away.
- 1-hour coaching session
- Join Focus Room for live group sprints.
